Sat 1 & Sun 2 June 2024, Brockwell Park, London

Our very own Mystic Meg gives you an insight into what to expect for the next month [just don’t ask for their credentials, alright…]

  

You’re on the hunt for tea, and we love that gossip girl side of you. Just make sure you don’t get too involved in other people’s business this month, as it might bite you on the ass when you spot someone in the smoking area you really shouldn’t have been talking about… 

There’s always gonna be another mountain, you’re always gonna wanna make it move… Life is a climb, and we know you’re determined to get to the top. Just remember that sometimes you haven’t always got the right shoes, and that’s fine – you’ll get there. 

OK – this is your season to make every party you attend the best ever. We look to you to bring the party, the cheeseboard, the playlist, and the designated crying areas. You’re a healer babes, we love ya. 

Just keep swimming, darling! And we don’t mean hitting your local community centre for a quick dip in your best cozzie. You’ve got it, you know you’ve got it, so just keep doing you and everything will be fine. Promise! We’re experts! 

This month is all about you babes, the same as every month. Hit the Christmas markets and stand on the tables singing Sweet Caroline, the colder months need your warm energy. But just make sure you share the mic, no one likes a show off. 

Time to chill – as you always do. Have a bath, stick on a face mask, listen to the Love Me Like You Christmas Version by Little Mix, you deserve to get into the festive spirit in style. Yes, this is a real horoscope. 

As a spontaneous, chaotic fun Gemini mess, we challenge you to do something even wilder this month. It’s time to ask a stranger in a smoking area what their favourite Rachel Stevens song is, you never know, you might make a new best friend. 

Get outta ya shell, and onto the dance floor! We know you like your home comforts, but tis the season to be playful, so get your shiniest crop top on and get out there! Top tip – head out on a Thursday, then you’ve got the weekend to stay in and be your best sensitive self. 

We’ve heard you roar, Leo, but it’s time to see you soar. The red carpet is ready for you whenever you’re ready – whether it’s a work Christmas party, a strut down the freezer aisle in Asda, or your dramatic return to your hometown. You got it, work it. 

Virgo’s are represented by the goddess of wheat and agriculture, but this is not your signal to run through a field of wheat wearing a Barbour. We’re talking about taking the time to continue being that level headed, logical legend that we all love – every friendship group needs a Virgo [and you can claim Virgo’s Groove as your own song. Winner.] 

Equality is your bag, and we want a bump of that good Libra energy this month. You don’t know how important your level headed mind is, especially when you’re surrounded by chaotic mates at 4am trying to get an Uber. Give yourself a pat on the back this month Libra bb. 

You’re complicated, just like Avril Lavigne, which also makes you the sexiest horoscope [we don’t make the rules.] If your head’s feeling weird this month, belt out your fave Avril Lavigne song and we can promise your Scorpian self will feel instantly soothed. 

 

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